First of all, my kids are awesome. Just thought I'd throw that out there. I came into the living room to find them on the couch watching Dexter's Laboratory. I watched that show growing up so definite props to my brats for their choice of cartoons!
They're on fall break this week and I haven't seen them in (it feels like) forever so I got up early this morning and picked them up with absolutely nothing planned other than spending time together. We played a game with the dictionary. Jacob flipped through the pages and gave me words to see if I could define them. I was doing pretty good until he spat out "roll." I said that a roll is a pastry or bread. That's true, but that's not the definition he was looking for. I tried the verb, like what you do to a ball. Not what he wanted. He made me sit here and contemplate the many meanings of the word "roll," shooting down all of my responses, until I finally got frustrated and quit the game. At that point, he informed me that "roll" is the action inadvertantly performed by objects in water, such as a boat that rolls on the waves. Or as Jacob put it, "you know, like that song you always try to sing but can't." He was referring to "Rolling In the Deep" by Adele, which I sing just fine, thank you very much!
Bai is being all cuddly and sweet like she always does when she's sick. She was coughing a little bit when I picked her up and now she's getting slightly wheezy. I listened to her breathing when we got home and she didn't sound bad. I guess I need to check again. She's not coughing or anything anymore...she's just acting sick. The doctors gave her a daily corticosteriod that she's been using and that seems to be helping a lot. Even with the weather changing so drastically and so often, she hasn't had any trouble. I guess going without it these past few days since she's been out of school has made a difference. We'll have to keep an eye on her and utilize the inhaler.
My moods have been eratic lately. One day I'm fine. The next day I'm pissed and two hours later I'm depressed. Then the next day I'm just a little down until around 3pm when I perk up and get in a great mood. This shit is crazy. I went to the EFC to talk to my med lady. She thinks I might be a little depressed and very stressed out and it's manifesting in emotional displays. I told her about not being able to focus on school and having no motivation. She increased one of meds and added another. So now I'm on 4 different pills. That sounds worse than it is...2 of them are "as needed" and I never really take them.
I want to get an appointment book. Like the kind offices use. I might make a trip to Walmart and look at what they have. I've tried just drawing out my own little time charts, but I don't have anything to keep them in. I guess the best and cheapest solution to that would be to buy a small binder. Golly, I'm smart.
Right now I'm tired. And hungry. I'm going to get off my ass (which will be difficult because I'm laying with the computer in my lap, Bai cuddled up to my left, and Jacob drapped across my legs) and find something to eat. Then I might talk the kids into taking a nap with me. It's worth a shot.
Deuces!
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
I Want to See Andromeda
The weather's changing. Ups and downs, different every day, can't make up its mind. But it's definitely turning into that crisp, clean air that only comes with the cold. Winter equals clear, dark skies with lots of stars. It's perfect for star gazing. I can't wait until Heather and I can put something soft down in the bed of her truck and bundle up together under a thick blanket, just stare up at the stars. I wish I had a telescope. One year I had access to one and I'd go out and examine the sky almost every night. I loved to discover new areas of the endless universe. The nearest galaxy to ours is Andromeda and it's clearly visable through a telescope from November to February. There are a few planets close enough to make out vague details (I know, oxymoron, but I don't know how else to say it). Even without a close-up view of the distant forever, I still want to just go lay and look.
I've had a few bad days lately. Nothing in particular, just cranky and mopey. Work is going well, in general...some bullshit here and there, but that's everywhere. I've decided that the grass is always greener on the other side. I know people have been saying that forever, but I never really applied it to anything until now. There are some things I miss about Sub Depot. Like the familiarity, the routine, the people. Quiznos is getting easier. I've established a routine there and it's not so foreign anymore. There's still a lot I could improve on as far as memorizing what goes on which sandwich and portion sizes...but for the most part, I'm comfortable there. Conrad has been talking about switching me to evenings because the crew we have for 2nd shift now sucks ass. They always leave things in a state that causes the morning crew (Conrad and me) to get behind because we have to clean up the mess they left. He's been saying that he needs me on nights, but he doesn't have anyone that can replace me on days because the same people would screw things up in the mornings too. I really don't want to work 2nd shift. We close at 9 so I would probably be scheduled 12-8 most days, with someone coming in at 4 or 5 and closing. That would take pretty much my whole day away. I'd sleep til 10 and get home after dark. I hate getting up before 6 every day, but at least I'm out of there at 2 and I can still get shit done. Today Conrad mentioned that Kyle (our District Mananger) asked him if he knew anyone that needed a job and could run a store. Conrad said he thought about telling Kyle that I could do it, but he wanted to check with me first. I told him that I wouldn't mind, depending on location, pay, and hours expectations. I know that store managers make a lot more than I'm getting paid now, but it's salary and at least 50 hours a week. That's fine with me. But if it starts getting to be 53, 55 hours, no way Jose. I do have school and kids and a life. I'd like the money, don't get me wrong, but it may not be worth the sacrafice.
I have a headache. I've been drinking quite a bit of caffeine lately and I've laid off of it for the past 2 days. I hate the withdrawals. If I can just get through the first 2 or 3 days of it, I'll be okay...but damn my head hurts. And I take Excedrine, which has caffeine so it kinda defeats the purpose.
I'm super proud of Babygirl, Heather's dog. She's been doing very well with the potty training. No accidents in a long time. We've been letting her run around the house after she goes out and does #1 and #2. If she only does one or the other, she has to go back in her crate until she goes back out and does the other. Lately she's been doing both in one trip so she's been running around pretty much all night. Good doggie!
Bella is back to her old self. Before she started going into heat, she was very playful. She'd run around the house and wrestle with our arms. Then she just stopped. All she did was lay around and meow and stick her ass in our faces. But now, since she got spayed, she's playful again. I think moreso than before. There's a little green bouncy ball that she bats at and chases. She plays with Babygirl. I like her better this way...lol
The kids are doing ok. No problems, nothing to report. I haven't seen them much lately because of work and I went out of town last weekend. I miss them. I didn't get them today after work because I forced myself to do homework. The assignment was due 2 days ago, but I'm a slacker and just now got around to it. I have another assignment due this coming Monday. I'm reeeeally gonna try to get it done before it's due. My academic advisor called me today and kinda chewed me out for being such a slacker. She's got me going to school for 3 additional hours every week to work on homework. I have to sign in and out when I go. I can do it all in one day, or split it into an hour and half for 2 days. Plus my regular class from 6 to 10 on Monday nights. Fun, fun. But hopefully it will get me back in the swing of things.
My mood is pretty mellow right now. I'm gonna go take a bath. Maybe smooth legs will make me feel better. Not that I don't feel well, I'm just blah. That's it for now....
I've had a few bad days lately. Nothing in particular, just cranky and mopey. Work is going well, in general...some bullshit here and there, but that's everywhere. I've decided that the grass is always greener on the other side. I know people have been saying that forever, but I never really applied it to anything until now. There are some things I miss about Sub Depot. Like the familiarity, the routine, the people. Quiznos is getting easier. I've established a routine there and it's not so foreign anymore. There's still a lot I could improve on as far as memorizing what goes on which sandwich and portion sizes...but for the most part, I'm comfortable there. Conrad has been talking about switching me to evenings because the crew we have for 2nd shift now sucks ass. They always leave things in a state that causes the morning crew (Conrad and me) to get behind because we have to clean up the mess they left. He's been saying that he needs me on nights, but he doesn't have anyone that can replace me on days because the same people would screw things up in the mornings too. I really don't want to work 2nd shift. We close at 9 so I would probably be scheduled 12-8 most days, with someone coming in at 4 or 5 and closing. That would take pretty much my whole day away. I'd sleep til 10 and get home after dark. I hate getting up before 6 every day, but at least I'm out of there at 2 and I can still get shit done. Today Conrad mentioned that Kyle (our District Mananger) asked him if he knew anyone that needed a job and could run a store. Conrad said he thought about telling Kyle that I could do it, but he wanted to check with me first. I told him that I wouldn't mind, depending on location, pay, and hours expectations. I know that store managers make a lot more than I'm getting paid now, but it's salary and at least 50 hours a week. That's fine with me. But if it starts getting to be 53, 55 hours, no way Jose. I do have school and kids and a life. I'd like the money, don't get me wrong, but it may not be worth the sacrafice.
I have a headache. I've been drinking quite a bit of caffeine lately and I've laid off of it for the past 2 days. I hate the withdrawals. If I can just get through the first 2 or 3 days of it, I'll be okay...but damn my head hurts. And I take Excedrine, which has caffeine so it kinda defeats the purpose.
I'm super proud of Babygirl, Heather's dog. She's been doing very well with the potty training. No accidents in a long time. We've been letting her run around the house after she goes out and does #1 and #2. If she only does one or the other, she has to go back in her crate until she goes back out and does the other. Lately she's been doing both in one trip so she's been running around pretty much all night. Good doggie!
Bella is back to her old self. Before she started going into heat, she was very playful. She'd run around the house and wrestle with our arms. Then she just stopped. All she did was lay around and meow and stick her ass in our faces. But now, since she got spayed, she's playful again. I think moreso than before. There's a little green bouncy ball that she bats at and chases. She plays with Babygirl. I like her better this way...lol
The kids are doing ok. No problems, nothing to report. I haven't seen them much lately because of work and I went out of town last weekend. I miss them. I didn't get them today after work because I forced myself to do homework. The assignment was due 2 days ago, but I'm a slacker and just now got around to it. I have another assignment due this coming Monday. I'm reeeeally gonna try to get it done before it's due. My academic advisor called me today and kinda chewed me out for being such a slacker. She's got me going to school for 3 additional hours every week to work on homework. I have to sign in and out when I go. I can do it all in one day, or split it into an hour and half for 2 days. Plus my regular class from 6 to 10 on Monday nights. Fun, fun. But hopefully it will get me back in the swing of things.
My mood is pretty mellow right now. I'm gonna go take a bath. Maybe smooth legs will make me feel better. Not that I don't feel well, I'm just blah. That's it for now....
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Your Friendly Neighborhood Update
Today is Tuesday. I'm off work and I don't have anything that I absolutely must get done. I slept until 10:30am, got online and downloaded the syllabus and textbook for my new class and did some of the reading, talked to a couple people on the phone, wandered around between the kitchen and pantry looking for food, and now I'm writing because I actually have time.
I never did find anything to eat. The options are: frozen pizza (which you have to wait for), sandwiches (which you have to assemble), and an assortment of chips (none of which sound good right now). I'm gonna wait until I'm hungrier and therefore more willing to work for my meal.
Heather has to close tonight, which sucks really bad because that means she won't be getting home for 6 more hours. If I had running around to do or something to occupy my time then it wouldn't seem so long, but I'm gonna be home all day, killing time. Of course, there are dishes and clothes that can be washed. The bedroom could use a little more cleaning (we tackled most of it last week). We have about 4 junk drawers and 3 closets (2 of which are walk-ins) that would REALLY benefit from some orgnaizing. And, as always, I could work on school stuff. So I won't dare say that I have nothing to do.
This past Saturday was the day we celebrated our anniversary. It didn't go exactly as planned, but it was still completely amazing. I got some beautiful roses, lilies, and an assortment of wildflowers from a florist and Nikki arranged them in vases and surrounded them with little tealight candles while Heather and I were at dinner. So when we got home and Heather walked in, she was surprized. But that's not the best part...the best part is who else was waiting when she walked in. For the past few weeks I have been emailing back and forth with Tiffany Shea, who is Heather's favorite indie singer/songwriter. We actually went to see her perform at a little bar on our first date. Well, I got Tiff to come give us a private concert at home so Heather about shit a brick. It was awesome! Tiffany brought us a copy of one of her unfinished CDs that has Heather's favorite song by her on it. She's been looking for that song forever and couldn't find it because Tiff hadn't recorded it yet. So now Heather has a copy of a few songs that aren't even released yet. It was a crazy night, but it turned out amazing and I'm so glad I got to do that for her. I think I might have won the Girlfriend of the Year award for that one!
I have still been feeling really good. I had a mopey day yesterday because my uterus hates me, but other than normal female bullshit, I'm good. I did miss a dose of my meds a few days ago...it was an accident, I swear! But it was only one day so hopefully it won't mess me up too much. I always tell Heather when I realize I've missed a dose to give her about a week to prepare for whatever hell may descend upon us as a result. She's usually pretty understanding, but I can be intolerable sometimes. It shouldn't be a big deal right now because I'm so happy in general that a slight chemical misfire wouldn't affect it much. Hopefully.
I have such a light heart all of a sudden. For years, I have held on to anger and hatred that I didn't know was affecting my life everyday. I hated someone because I always had and I guess it just never occured to me to stop, or I felt like I couldn't stop. I didn't want to feel that hatred. I even asked people to pray for me to find peace in my heart when it came to that person. If I were a Christian, I would say that God has answered that prayer. In fact, I feel something pretty similar to that. I don't really know how to explain my beliefs and that doesn't matter because it works for me and I am happy. The point is: I no longer harbor that hate and fury. I don't have any negativity in my heart, for the first time since childhood. It's so light and calm and peaceful. I'm actually pretty disappointed in myself for allowing the negativity to affect me for so long. I just didn't realize there was an option to let it go. I've always said that people can't control how they feel, and I still believe that to some extent I guess. I just made a conscious decision to end that emotion and it was gone. I just thought about why I felt that way to begin with and when it didn't make any sense, I said, well ok I just won't feel that way anymore. Just like that. So, yeah.
The chirrens are doing well. Bai isn't sick for now. Jacob isn't evil for now. They are both doing really well in school. Jacob's report card had six graded subjects. His grades were: 100, 99, 97, 94, 93, 90. This is sooo my kid! The first three grades were pertaining to English (reading, comprehension, and language, I think). The last three were math, science, and social studies. I was looking at the grades and I was praising him and then I said, "so what's up with this 90 in social studies?" and he shrugged. I told him we'd have to work on that and he said, "at least I got in the 90s." True that, yo! I forgot how great that is. I forgot that most kids score in the 80s. I just assumed he would get high 90s because that's what I always got in school and that was the standard. When he said that, I laughed and told him that he was right and that he did a great job and I'm super proud of him. Unfortunately for him, though, he has shown me that he is capable of top grades and therefore he will be expected to maintain those grades for the next 9 years. Poor kid. Bai only had 3 areas to be graded in and the options were: Below target, On target, or Beyond target. She is beyond target in all but 1, which is handwriting. In that, she is on target. I'm pleasantly surprized at that because I figured her handwriting would be below. She still needs work on it, but hell, she's on target! I'm so proud of my bai bai. I really hope she can do as well as Jacob acedemically becasue I don't want to have different standards for them. It wouldn't be fair to Jacob if he was expected to bring home straight As and Bai could get by with Bs and Cs, but it wouldn't be fair to Baileigh if she was expected to match Jacob's grades if she really isn't capable of that. I know that school doesn't come as easy to everyone as it did to me so I don't want to put pressure on Bai to reach unrealistic goals. If I scold her for lower grades when she really did try her best, then that's just going to make her feel like her best isn't good enough and she'll never be able to be proud of herself. I guess I just have to keep all that in mind and make sure I'm doing all I can to help when she needs it. We'll figure it out.
I'm still liking work ok. I think they're about to switch me to night shift because shit's not getting done and we don't really have a strong leader in the evenings. I don't want to work nights, but if there's a raise involved and guarenteed hours, I'll do it.
That's it for now. I just recieved new information by phone that I might have to write about later, but for now I'm going to sign off and try to figure out this new delima. It's always something! lol
I never did find anything to eat. The options are: frozen pizza (which you have to wait for), sandwiches (which you have to assemble), and an assortment of chips (none of which sound good right now). I'm gonna wait until I'm hungrier and therefore more willing to work for my meal.
Heather has to close tonight, which sucks really bad because that means she won't be getting home for 6 more hours. If I had running around to do or something to occupy my time then it wouldn't seem so long, but I'm gonna be home all day, killing time. Of course, there are dishes and clothes that can be washed. The bedroom could use a little more cleaning (we tackled most of it last week). We have about 4 junk drawers and 3 closets (2 of which are walk-ins) that would REALLY benefit from some orgnaizing. And, as always, I could work on school stuff. So I won't dare say that I have nothing to do.
This past Saturday was the day we celebrated our anniversary. It didn't go exactly as planned, but it was still completely amazing. I got some beautiful roses, lilies, and an assortment of wildflowers from a florist and Nikki arranged them in vases and surrounded them with little tealight candles while Heather and I were at dinner. So when we got home and Heather walked in, she was surprized. But that's not the best part...the best part is who else was waiting when she walked in. For the past few weeks I have been emailing back and forth with Tiffany Shea, who is Heather's favorite indie singer/songwriter. We actually went to see her perform at a little bar on our first date. Well, I got Tiff to come give us a private concert at home so Heather about shit a brick. It was awesome! Tiffany brought us a copy of one of her unfinished CDs that has Heather's favorite song by her on it. She's been looking for that song forever and couldn't find it because Tiff hadn't recorded it yet. So now Heather has a copy of a few songs that aren't even released yet. It was a crazy night, but it turned out amazing and I'm so glad I got to do that for her. I think I might have won the Girlfriend of the Year award for that one!
I have still been feeling really good. I had a mopey day yesterday because my uterus hates me, but other than normal female bullshit, I'm good. I did miss a dose of my meds a few days ago...it was an accident, I swear! But it was only one day so hopefully it won't mess me up too much. I always tell Heather when I realize I've missed a dose to give her about a week to prepare for whatever hell may descend upon us as a result. She's usually pretty understanding, but I can be intolerable sometimes. It shouldn't be a big deal right now because I'm so happy in general that a slight chemical misfire wouldn't affect it much. Hopefully.
I have such a light heart all of a sudden. For years, I have held on to anger and hatred that I didn't know was affecting my life everyday. I hated someone because I always had and I guess it just never occured to me to stop, or I felt like I couldn't stop. I didn't want to feel that hatred. I even asked people to pray for me to find peace in my heart when it came to that person. If I were a Christian, I would say that God has answered that prayer. In fact, I feel something pretty similar to that. I don't really know how to explain my beliefs and that doesn't matter because it works for me and I am happy. The point is: I no longer harbor that hate and fury. I don't have any negativity in my heart, for the first time since childhood. It's so light and calm and peaceful. I'm actually pretty disappointed in myself for allowing the negativity to affect me for so long. I just didn't realize there was an option to let it go. I've always said that people can't control how they feel, and I still believe that to some extent I guess. I just made a conscious decision to end that emotion and it was gone. I just thought about why I felt that way to begin with and when it didn't make any sense, I said, well ok I just won't feel that way anymore. Just like that. So, yeah.
The chirrens are doing well. Bai isn't sick for now. Jacob isn't evil for now. They are both doing really well in school. Jacob's report card had six graded subjects. His grades were: 100, 99, 97, 94, 93, 90. This is sooo my kid! The first three grades were pertaining to English (reading, comprehension, and language, I think). The last three were math, science, and social studies. I was looking at the grades and I was praising him and then I said, "so what's up with this 90 in social studies?" and he shrugged. I told him we'd have to work on that and he said, "at least I got in the 90s." True that, yo! I forgot how great that is. I forgot that most kids score in the 80s. I just assumed he would get high 90s because that's what I always got in school and that was the standard. When he said that, I laughed and told him that he was right and that he did a great job and I'm super proud of him. Unfortunately for him, though, he has shown me that he is capable of top grades and therefore he will be expected to maintain those grades for the next 9 years. Poor kid. Bai only had 3 areas to be graded in and the options were: Below target, On target, or Beyond target. She is beyond target in all but 1, which is handwriting. In that, she is on target. I'm pleasantly surprized at that because I figured her handwriting would be below. She still needs work on it, but hell, she's on target! I'm so proud of my bai bai. I really hope she can do as well as Jacob acedemically becasue I don't want to have different standards for them. It wouldn't be fair to Jacob if he was expected to bring home straight As and Bai could get by with Bs and Cs, but it wouldn't be fair to Baileigh if she was expected to match Jacob's grades if she really isn't capable of that. I know that school doesn't come as easy to everyone as it did to me so I don't want to put pressure on Bai to reach unrealistic goals. If I scold her for lower grades when she really did try her best, then that's just going to make her feel like her best isn't good enough and she'll never be able to be proud of herself. I guess I just have to keep all that in mind and make sure I'm doing all I can to help when she needs it. We'll figure it out.
I'm still liking work ok. I think they're about to switch me to night shift because shit's not getting done and we don't really have a strong leader in the evenings. I don't want to work nights, but if there's a raise involved and guarenteed hours, I'll do it.
That's it for now. I just recieved new information by phone that I might have to write about later, but for now I'm going to sign off and try to figure out this new delima. It's always something! lol
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Finally Relaxing
I'm feeling better. A lot better. I'm such a roller coaster.
I'm relieved to be better able to focus on assignments for school. I don't know what was wrong with me for a little while. I just couldn't make myself do what I needed to do. I have one more week of my current class, which is really two weeks because next Monday is Labor Day so we're out. I'm excited about my last team assignment. It should be fun. The instructor I have now is very...unstructured...I guess. She doesn't really like powerpoint presentations so she encourages us to find more creative ways to present our assignments. For this week, we're supposed to pick a problem and determine two main decisions that need to be made to solve it. One of my teammates suggested the idea of a couple trying to decide whether to buy a house in the suburbs or rent an apartment in the city. I threw out a few of the issues that the couple would need to consider and we decided to present using a role play activity. So I'm going to be a real estate advisor and inform the couple of the pros and cons of each option. One teammate will be the one in favor of the house and the other in favor of the apartment and we'll show the decision making process through acting it out. Neat, huh? So, yeah...feeling better about school. For now...lol
Work is ok too. Lorenzo is on vacation right now and the manager we have in his place is turning out to be pretty cool. I didn't like him at all at first. He's a big black guy named Conrad. The first couple of days he was there, Lorenzo was trying to show him around and give him a run down of how we do things in our store. Those days, Conrad just sort of stood around and observed so I got the impression that he was lazy. Then when Lorenzo left for vacay, Conrad stepped up to the plate and he's doing awesome. I won't say that he does more than Lorenzo because I really don't know what all Lorenzo does, but Conrad does do things more efficiently. There's more organization to everything and stuff gets done quicker. Normally I feel like I don't have enough time to do the things that have to get done before I leave and lately, like today, I was walking around looking for shit to do. Part of that could be that business is slow. Extrememly slow. But even if things had been busier, it would have been more orgnaized than I'm used to. There's not as much prep going on during the lunch "rush" anymore. I'm wondering if Lorenzo is coming back. He mentioned to me that he wasn't planning on it. I guess we'll see.
My Bai has been sick quite a bit lately. A couple of weeks ago she and Jacob were both kinda sick, coughing and fever. They went to the doctor and it was just a virus, no biggie. Well then Josh got sick. He had croup, pink eye in both eyes, an ear infection, and some other viral infection all at the same time. Poor baby. He's feeling better now, but Bai is sick again. This time it's an infection in her throat. There are little pus pockets all over the back of it. She got sent home from school yesterday because of it. Her temp got up to 101.6 at school. William took her to the doctor today and they gave her some antibiotics. I'm just glad it's not strep. If there's anyone with strep within a mile from me, I get it. I avoid that shit like the plague.
Jacob is acting weird again. He seems depressed sometimes. Not always, but often enough to bother me. Sometimes I feel like I might have done or said something to upset him because when I ask him what's wrong, he doesn't want to talk about it. He doesn't say that; he just says there's nothing wrong, but obviously there is. And then when I tell him that if something's wrong, he can talk to me about it, he just says "I know" and goes on about his business all mopey. I know that his medicine can cause depression as a side effect, but I wouldn't go as far as to say he is actually depressed. Most of the time he seems perfectly fine. I don't know. I can't wait to get the doctor bills paid off so he can go back and see Edith (to check on the meds) and Gayla (just to talk).
Speaking of paying the bills off, that should be happening very soon. I'm anxiously awaiting my refund check from my student loan. I'm going to pay off both my and Jacob's accounts at EFC. Bai still has an ambulance bill I've been paying on that I'll be able to take care of. There are a few other bills that need attention and then my car needs some minor work. The idle air sensor control valve doohickey thingamabob needs replacing and I need a new tire rod. I'm pretty sure that's it for now, but I'll have good ol' Ridgetop Auto give the whole thing a once over just in case. I need to take the car through emissions testing, which it'll fail until I have the thingamabob fixed, so that I can get a temp tag until I can pass emissions and get a permenant one. My shit expires today. Oh crap! For some reason I thought I had more time. Damn, the end of the month just crept up on me. Well I get off work early tomorrow so I'll go then and just hope I don't get pulled over on the way there.
Heather and I are doing really well. I know I don't talk about her much and that's mostly because our business is our business, but the fact that I'm happier with her lately than I've been in a long time makes me want tell people how happy I am. Our biggest problem was that I wasn't putting enough of myself into the relationship because I was (unknowingly, or accidentally, or something) putting too much of myself into other things. She said something one night that finally made me see things from her perspective, which I had been failing to do since we got together. It was a comment that she had made countless times before, but for some reason it hit me that night and I changed what I needed to change. We're sooo much better now. What I've been thinking was us just not being compatible was really just me being stubborn and blind. She's no saint or anything, but since I've come around about what I needed to do, she's putting more effort into things from her side too. I'm happy.
Jacob's birthday marked my two year anniversary with Heather. At the time, I couldn't afford to do anything for her to celebrate. Anticipating my school money, though, I've been making plans for an awesome gift for her. I won't say what yet, just in case she happens to read this, but it's gonna be AWESOME!
In a few weeks Heather and I are going to Pigeon Forge (I think. Maybe Gatlinburg? Something like that) with her mom and stepdad. They were planning a trip up there and asked us to come along. I haven't really spent time with them in forever. We did get to hang out with them for a little while last time we went camping, but the past several times Heather has gone to West TN to visit them, I haven't been able to go. It'll be nice. I hope we get to see Jace, Heather's baby nephew. I haven't met him yet. He was born on Easter. He's a cute baby, but not in a cute baby sort of way...lol
That's pretty much my life right now. Nothing really going on. No big issues to stress over. I'm sure that'll change in time because that's what life does. Ups and downs. But for now I'm just enjoying being able to relax. That's right, I said relax. In fact, when I close this up, I'm going to play a video game. Then I'm going to attempt to cook dinner and have it ready right about the time Heather gets home from work. It's breakfast stuff: sausage links, bacon, eggs, biscuits...but I'm a really lousy cook. In fact, I think I'll let her do the eggs because I still haven't mastered frying them. I can scramble them all day long, but even that I don't do the way she likes them. She likes them light and fluffy. I like mine to be kinda browned in places. So, yeah, she can cook the eggs.
I'm gonna sign off. Don't know when I'll write again because I never know when I'll have time. So until then...
I'm relieved to be better able to focus on assignments for school. I don't know what was wrong with me for a little while. I just couldn't make myself do what I needed to do. I have one more week of my current class, which is really two weeks because next Monday is Labor Day so we're out. I'm excited about my last team assignment. It should be fun. The instructor I have now is very...unstructured...I guess. She doesn't really like powerpoint presentations so she encourages us to find more creative ways to present our assignments. For this week, we're supposed to pick a problem and determine two main decisions that need to be made to solve it. One of my teammates suggested the idea of a couple trying to decide whether to buy a house in the suburbs or rent an apartment in the city. I threw out a few of the issues that the couple would need to consider and we decided to present using a role play activity. So I'm going to be a real estate advisor and inform the couple of the pros and cons of each option. One teammate will be the one in favor of the house and the other in favor of the apartment and we'll show the decision making process through acting it out. Neat, huh? So, yeah...feeling better about school. For now...lol
Work is ok too. Lorenzo is on vacation right now and the manager we have in his place is turning out to be pretty cool. I didn't like him at all at first. He's a big black guy named Conrad. The first couple of days he was there, Lorenzo was trying to show him around and give him a run down of how we do things in our store. Those days, Conrad just sort of stood around and observed so I got the impression that he was lazy. Then when Lorenzo left for vacay, Conrad stepped up to the plate and he's doing awesome. I won't say that he does more than Lorenzo because I really don't know what all Lorenzo does, but Conrad does do things more efficiently. There's more organization to everything and stuff gets done quicker. Normally I feel like I don't have enough time to do the things that have to get done before I leave and lately, like today, I was walking around looking for shit to do. Part of that could be that business is slow. Extrememly slow. But even if things had been busier, it would have been more orgnaized than I'm used to. There's not as much prep going on during the lunch "rush" anymore. I'm wondering if Lorenzo is coming back. He mentioned to me that he wasn't planning on it. I guess we'll see.
My Bai has been sick quite a bit lately. A couple of weeks ago she and Jacob were both kinda sick, coughing and fever. They went to the doctor and it was just a virus, no biggie. Well then Josh got sick. He had croup, pink eye in both eyes, an ear infection, and some other viral infection all at the same time. Poor baby. He's feeling better now, but Bai is sick again. This time it's an infection in her throat. There are little pus pockets all over the back of it. She got sent home from school yesterday because of it. Her temp got up to 101.6 at school. William took her to the doctor today and they gave her some antibiotics. I'm just glad it's not strep. If there's anyone with strep within a mile from me, I get it. I avoid that shit like the plague.
Jacob is acting weird again. He seems depressed sometimes. Not always, but often enough to bother me. Sometimes I feel like I might have done or said something to upset him because when I ask him what's wrong, he doesn't want to talk about it. He doesn't say that; he just says there's nothing wrong, but obviously there is. And then when I tell him that if something's wrong, he can talk to me about it, he just says "I know" and goes on about his business all mopey. I know that his medicine can cause depression as a side effect, but I wouldn't go as far as to say he is actually depressed. Most of the time he seems perfectly fine. I don't know. I can't wait to get the doctor bills paid off so he can go back and see Edith (to check on the meds) and Gayla (just to talk).
Speaking of paying the bills off, that should be happening very soon. I'm anxiously awaiting my refund check from my student loan. I'm going to pay off both my and Jacob's accounts at EFC. Bai still has an ambulance bill I've been paying on that I'll be able to take care of. There are a few other bills that need attention and then my car needs some minor work. The idle air sensor control valve doohickey thingamabob needs replacing and I need a new tire rod. I'm pretty sure that's it for now, but I'll have good ol' Ridgetop Auto give the whole thing a once over just in case. I need to take the car through emissions testing, which it'll fail until I have the thingamabob fixed, so that I can get a temp tag until I can pass emissions and get a permenant one. My shit expires today. Oh crap! For some reason I thought I had more time. Damn, the end of the month just crept up on me. Well I get off work early tomorrow so I'll go then and just hope I don't get pulled over on the way there.
Heather and I are doing really well. I know I don't talk about her much and that's mostly because our business is our business, but the fact that I'm happier with her lately than I've been in a long time makes me want tell people how happy I am. Our biggest problem was that I wasn't putting enough of myself into the relationship because I was (unknowingly, or accidentally, or something) putting too much of myself into other things. She said something one night that finally made me see things from her perspective, which I had been failing to do since we got together. It was a comment that she had made countless times before, but for some reason it hit me that night and I changed what I needed to change. We're sooo much better now. What I've been thinking was us just not being compatible was really just me being stubborn and blind. She's no saint or anything, but since I've come around about what I needed to do, she's putting more effort into things from her side too. I'm happy.
Jacob's birthday marked my two year anniversary with Heather. At the time, I couldn't afford to do anything for her to celebrate. Anticipating my school money, though, I've been making plans for an awesome gift for her. I won't say what yet, just in case she happens to read this, but it's gonna be AWESOME!
In a few weeks Heather and I are going to Pigeon Forge (I think. Maybe Gatlinburg? Something like that) with her mom and stepdad. They were planning a trip up there and asked us to come along. I haven't really spent time with them in forever. We did get to hang out with them for a little while last time we went camping, but the past several times Heather has gone to West TN to visit them, I haven't been able to go. It'll be nice. I hope we get to see Jace, Heather's baby nephew. I haven't met him yet. He was born on Easter. He's a cute baby, but not in a cute baby sort of way...lol
That's pretty much my life right now. Nothing really going on. No big issues to stress over. I'm sure that'll change in time because that's what life does. Ups and downs. But for now I'm just enjoying being able to relax. That's right, I said relax. In fact, when I close this up, I'm going to play a video game. Then I'm going to attempt to cook dinner and have it ready right about the time Heather gets home from work. It's breakfast stuff: sausage links, bacon, eggs, biscuits...but I'm a really lousy cook. In fact, I think I'll let her do the eggs because I still haven't mastered frying them. I can scramble them all day long, but even that I don't do the way she likes them. She likes them light and fluffy. I like mine to be kinda browned in places. So, yeah, she can cook the eggs.
I'm gonna sign off. Don't know when I'll write again because I never know when I'll have time. So until then...
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Not Right Now...
I want to write about all kinds of shit, but I just can't right now. I don't have the energy. I feel myself getting depressed and I know the logical steps to take in order to prevent it, but I don't have the strength. Not right now.
There are things I want to do, but I can't right now. Writing is one of those things. And the really fucked up part is, writing is usually what I want to do when I can't do the things I need to do. *deep sigh*
Maybe later.
There are things I want to do, but I can't right now. Writing is one of those things. And the really fucked up part is, writing is usually what I want to do when I can't do the things I need to do. *deep sigh*
Maybe later.
Thursday, August 4, 2011
Oh, you know...the usual
I have GOT to start writing more often.
My mood has been pretty upbeat lately, I think. I find that I live in the now. When I'm in a good mood, I don't really acknowledge ever being in a bad one; and vice versa.
This past Monday was the last day of my Foundations in Biological Psychology class. That class kicked my ass. It wasn't difficult and there wasn't too much work. It was interesting material. I'm just really tired. The statistics class before this one is where the trouble started. I got behind in that class and ended up not even turning in my last assignment, allowing myself to get a 'C' which is unheard of for me. Then when BioPsych started, I was still in a funk and I got behind in there too. The only assignments that I turned in on time were the 3 team assignments. All of my individual ones were late, which caused deductions in scores, which causes a lower grade than I like, but I deserve it. I haven't gotten my final grade for that one yet, but I know the highest it can be is a high 'B'. I have become quite the slacker! My next class is Cognitive Psych. I am going to really really really try to do better in here. I'll have a new instructor. Kellye Somethingorother. We'll see how that goes.
The chirrens start school this Monday. We had to go meet their teachers and I had about 6 pages of shit, front and back, to fill out for each of them. They both seemed nice, but they're supposed to. Jacob's 1st grade teacher, Mrs. Jones, seemed nice at first too. She turned out to be a complete bitch. She would send notes home every day saying that Jacob had done something else wrong. He was constantly misbehaving. So William wrote her a note back saying to send him directly to the principal's office for a paddling for every offense. She continued to send notes home, but never sent Jacob for a paddling so William wrote her back and told her that if she wasn't going to send Jacob to the principal like he suggested, then he didn't want to hear about all the acting up Jacob was doing. Her response was that if she sent him for a paddling every time, then he'd get paddled several times a day. THAT'S THE FUCKING POINT, LADY!!! If he realizes that he'll get his ass busted any time he acts out, then he won't act out. This argument went on for the better part of the school year. Mrs. Wilson, his 2nd grade teacher, was much better. She was very patient and softspoken, but eventually Jacob got the better of her and we had a conference. That was when we decided to take him to be evaluated and explore the possibility of medication, which turned out to be a fabulous idea. William and I were both soooo against that for the longest time. It has really helped though. Mrs. Wilson said that the first day Jacob walked in her classroom after starting his meds, he was like a completely different kid. He was paying attention, not bothering other students, participating in class, and following the rules. I must admit that being around him when he's missed a dose can be...difficult. Hopefully he'll get through this year without getting in much trouble. Last year he was suspended once and suspended from the bus several times. Jacob's my genius child and Baileigh's my angel child. Well, not angel, but not horrible either. She never got in trouble last year. She was sick a lot though. I think this year will be better.
Bai has an appointment tomorrow morning at Vanderbilt's Asthma and Allergy Clinic. Maybe we can figure out exactly what causes her flare ups and do a better job at preventing them. I have gotten a lot better at noticing symptoms earlier. We've been able to keep tabs on it before it gets too bad. Her last little episode was on July 4th and it wasn't really bad. She was mostly faking, which she has started doing for some reason. Attention probably. I'm smarter than she is though. I have a stethoscope. I know if she's really wheezing or just panting like she can't breathe. We've told her over and over not to fake that. I told her the story of the little boy who cried wolf and explained to her what it meant. I told her that if she keeps doing that then one day she'll really be very sick and we won't believe her because she lies about it so much. She hasn't done it anymore since, but then it's only been a month.
Work is work. It's ok. I'm still not loving it, but it is getting more tolerable every week. Lorenzo is trying to teach me Espanol. So far, besides counting to 10, I can say "I don't know," "large," "medium," "a little bit," and "Lorenzo is my friend." Those are all pretty obvious ones that most people know anyway. I really want a Spanish for Dummies book. I used to see those books everywhere. Math for Dummies, Cars for Dummies, Painting for Dummies, you name it...Dummies could do it. I haven't seen a ...for Dummies book in forever. Of course I haven't been to a bookstore in forever either. That's one of my favorite pasttimes. Hanging out at Books-A-Million, like the dork that I am.
Speaking of me being a dork...Harry Potter was awesome. The move. Not the experience. That was horrible. The line to get in stretched twice around the equator and then they let me skip most of it since my ticket was the first showing, but then when I called Nikki and Heather and told them to come on up to the front because they were letting early shows in first, they wouldn't let them in so I sat in the theater for 6 hours by myself while they waited in line. Then, because they didn't let the rest of the early shoes in first and people were still wrapped around the building, they had to wait until everyone got in before they started the movie. So whether you had the 12:01 show or the 12:45 show, they all started at the same time, which was 2 hours late. Of course I'm exaggerating a little bit, but that's what it felt like to me. I was more than a week late starting my period so my hormones were completely out of control and I was a mess. After I laid across the seats I was saving for Nic and Heather and cried until they came in, we watched the movie, which was most awesome. Then, the dumb fucks had 2 of the 3 exits from the parking lot blocked and were directing traffic from 3 directions out one exit. I was so ill. I got out of the car and went to bitch at the manager of the theater. I raised hell until the cops converged on us and then I left the building ranting and raving at the top of my voice, using every bit of profanity instilled in me. When I got back to the car, I couldn't stop fuming so I took off walking. By this time I had pissed Nikki and Heather off with my outrageous attitude and they reluctantly picked me up when they finally got out of the damn parking lot. I swore off Hollywood 27 that night. I will never, under and circumstances, return to that god-awful excuse for a movie theater. I MISS YOU, OPRY MILLS! It's pretty fucked up that THE MOVIE I've waited 6 years to see, the most awesome of the HPs, is overshadowed by the horrid experience I had that night.
Jacob's birthday is in 18 days. We're having the party in 16. I have 2 weeks to plan. This sucks. Actually, the planning is not what sucks. I already know pretty much what I want to do. I just don't have any money. I made a budget for the rest of the year, with every cent accounted for. However, my stupid ass forgot about the b-day party so I didn't factor that in. I would ask William to help, but he got ALL of their school supplies and clothes so that wouldn't be fair. I'll have to re-do my budget. No biggie.
Well it's nearing 7pm and I need to get off my lazy ass (I don't really believe I'm lazy. If I was lazy, I'd have more time to write.) and go get dinner. Until I find the time again....
My mood has been pretty upbeat lately, I think. I find that I live in the now. When I'm in a good mood, I don't really acknowledge ever being in a bad one; and vice versa.
This past Monday was the last day of my Foundations in Biological Psychology class. That class kicked my ass. It wasn't difficult and there wasn't too much work. It was interesting material. I'm just really tired. The statistics class before this one is where the trouble started. I got behind in that class and ended up not even turning in my last assignment, allowing myself to get a 'C' which is unheard of for me. Then when BioPsych started, I was still in a funk and I got behind in there too. The only assignments that I turned in on time were the 3 team assignments. All of my individual ones were late, which caused deductions in scores, which causes a lower grade than I like, but I deserve it. I haven't gotten my final grade for that one yet, but I know the highest it can be is a high 'B'. I have become quite the slacker! My next class is Cognitive Psych. I am going to really really really try to do better in here. I'll have a new instructor. Kellye Somethingorother. We'll see how that goes.
The chirrens start school this Monday. We had to go meet their teachers and I had about 6 pages of shit, front and back, to fill out for each of them. They both seemed nice, but they're supposed to. Jacob's 1st grade teacher, Mrs. Jones, seemed nice at first too. She turned out to be a complete bitch. She would send notes home every day saying that Jacob had done something else wrong. He was constantly misbehaving. So William wrote her a note back saying to send him directly to the principal's office for a paddling for every offense. She continued to send notes home, but never sent Jacob for a paddling so William wrote her back and told her that if she wasn't going to send Jacob to the principal like he suggested, then he didn't want to hear about all the acting up Jacob was doing. Her response was that if she sent him for a paddling every time, then he'd get paddled several times a day. THAT'S THE FUCKING POINT, LADY!!! If he realizes that he'll get his ass busted any time he acts out, then he won't act out. This argument went on for the better part of the school year. Mrs. Wilson, his 2nd grade teacher, was much better. She was very patient and softspoken, but eventually Jacob got the better of her and we had a conference. That was when we decided to take him to be evaluated and explore the possibility of medication, which turned out to be a fabulous idea. William and I were both soooo against that for the longest time. It has really helped though. Mrs. Wilson said that the first day Jacob walked in her classroom after starting his meds, he was like a completely different kid. He was paying attention, not bothering other students, participating in class, and following the rules. I must admit that being around him when he's missed a dose can be...difficult. Hopefully he'll get through this year without getting in much trouble. Last year he was suspended once and suspended from the bus several times. Jacob's my genius child and Baileigh's my angel child. Well, not angel, but not horrible either. She never got in trouble last year. She was sick a lot though. I think this year will be better.
Bai has an appointment tomorrow morning at Vanderbilt's Asthma and Allergy Clinic. Maybe we can figure out exactly what causes her flare ups and do a better job at preventing them. I have gotten a lot better at noticing symptoms earlier. We've been able to keep tabs on it before it gets too bad. Her last little episode was on July 4th and it wasn't really bad. She was mostly faking, which she has started doing for some reason. Attention probably. I'm smarter than she is though. I have a stethoscope. I know if she's really wheezing or just panting like she can't breathe. We've told her over and over not to fake that. I told her the story of the little boy who cried wolf and explained to her what it meant. I told her that if she keeps doing that then one day she'll really be very sick and we won't believe her because she lies about it so much. She hasn't done it anymore since, but then it's only been a month.
Work is work. It's ok. I'm still not loving it, but it is getting more tolerable every week. Lorenzo is trying to teach me Espanol. So far, besides counting to 10, I can say "I don't know," "large," "medium," "a little bit," and "Lorenzo is my friend." Those are all pretty obvious ones that most people know anyway. I really want a Spanish for Dummies book. I used to see those books everywhere. Math for Dummies, Cars for Dummies, Painting for Dummies, you name it...Dummies could do it. I haven't seen a ...for Dummies book in forever. Of course I haven't been to a bookstore in forever either. That's one of my favorite pasttimes. Hanging out at Books-A-Million, like the dork that I am.
Speaking of me being a dork...Harry Potter was awesome. The move. Not the experience. That was horrible. The line to get in stretched twice around the equator and then they let me skip most of it since my ticket was the first showing, but then when I called Nikki and Heather and told them to come on up to the front because they were letting early shows in first, they wouldn't let them in so I sat in the theater for 6 hours by myself while they waited in line. Then, because they didn't let the rest of the early shoes in first and people were still wrapped around the building, they had to wait until everyone got in before they started the movie. So whether you had the 12:01 show or the 12:45 show, they all started at the same time, which was 2 hours late. Of course I'm exaggerating a little bit, but that's what it felt like to me. I was more than a week late starting my period so my hormones were completely out of control and I was a mess. After I laid across the seats I was saving for Nic and Heather and cried until they came in, we watched the movie, which was most awesome. Then, the dumb fucks had 2 of the 3 exits from the parking lot blocked and were directing traffic from 3 directions out one exit. I was so ill. I got out of the car and went to bitch at the manager of the theater. I raised hell until the cops converged on us and then I left the building ranting and raving at the top of my voice, using every bit of profanity instilled in me. When I got back to the car, I couldn't stop fuming so I took off walking. By this time I had pissed Nikki and Heather off with my outrageous attitude and they reluctantly picked me up when they finally got out of the damn parking lot. I swore off Hollywood 27 that night. I will never, under and circumstances, return to that god-awful excuse for a movie theater. I MISS YOU, OPRY MILLS! It's pretty fucked up that THE MOVIE I've waited 6 years to see, the most awesome of the HPs, is overshadowed by the horrid experience I had that night.
Jacob's birthday is in 18 days. We're having the party in 16. I have 2 weeks to plan. This sucks. Actually, the planning is not what sucks. I already know pretty much what I want to do. I just don't have any money. I made a budget for the rest of the year, with every cent accounted for. However, my stupid ass forgot about the b-day party so I didn't factor that in. I would ask William to help, but he got ALL of their school supplies and clothes so that wouldn't be fair. I'll have to re-do my budget. No biggie.
Well it's nearing 7pm and I need to get off my lazy ass (I don't really believe I'm lazy. If I was lazy, I'd have more time to write.) and go get dinner. Until I find the time again....
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Work, Evil Children, Two-Toned Hair, and HARRY POTTER!!!!
Man, I feel like I haven't talked to you in forever! (and when I say "talked" I mean written; and when I say "you" I mean me. Because even though I know people will read it, my blog is my diary.)
So much has been going on....
I took that week between jobs and got a lot of much needed housework done, as planned. I also spent a lot of time with the kids, as planned. I started at Quiznos on July 2nd, as planned. And I'm adjusting well, I think. My first week sucked for a couple of reasons. 1) I developed a sinus infection, presumably from swimming the week prior so I was sick as fuck. 2) Due to the sinus infection, which rendered me miserable, my boss sent me home early on my 4th day so that I could go to the doctor (who gave me antibiotics in the form of mongo horse pills, but they totally worked so I guess I should stop bitching). 3) I felt completely lost because I had no idea what the hell I was doing and apparently neither does anyone else at that place. 4) For some reason I had a piss poor attitude and decided that I didn't like it there. That's more than a couple, but once I started naming off the reasons, more just kept coming to mind.
I'm feeling better about it now, though. I'm learning the morning routine. Everything is very structured. I've been opening so when I get there, I count the register and do the morning paperwork. Then I have to go through a checklist that's 4 pages long, but it's all one sentence shit.
"sauteed". I call it black and soggy. So work is going well, I guess.
The kids are evil. I don't know what the deal is lately. I guess they've been at my house too much and I'm way more lax than William so they've gotten out of the habit of behaving. There's a line between being mean and being stern and I've blurred it, apparently. I've always felt like William is too hard on them, telling them they can't do something for no reason at all. I feel like unless there's a reason why they shouldn't be allowed to do it, let them do it. Here lately though, they're taking advantage of my leniency. Instead of "Hey, Mom, can I go to the playground/basketball court/my friends house?" I get "I'm going to...." as they're running out the door. Um, excuse me? And normally it's "I'm hungry, when are we having dinner?" But lately its "I'm starving to death, are you ever gonna feed us?" Um, excuse me? And I know it's my fault. I don't discipline them. Part of the reason for that is I thought I had them trained. You know, you teach a dog something and once it's instilled in their minds, you never have to remind them. It just becomes the way it is. Don't get on the furniture. Don't jump on people. Don't shit in the floor. Don't snatch food. Stuff like that. You don't have to keep telling the dog for years and years. Once they learn it, they know it. For some reason, I assumed children were as smart, if not smarter, than dogs. They used to speak to me respectfully and ask permission for shit. I thought once they knew it was supposed to be done that way, they would just always do it. Nuh uh. I guess I'm gonna have to start putting the smack down again. And that really sucks because they don't like me when I put the smack down and I don't like it when they don't like me. So now, since they're evil, I have to make myself miserable. See how I blame them for my mistakes? Ya liked that, didn't ya?
School is...school. That last class I was in completely sucked. Statistics involves math. I hate math. This class is Biological Psychology, which is basically about the chemical aspect of craziness. I guess I should say psychological illnesses, but I'm just not that sensitive. I like the material. It's interesting and all. I'm just not feeling school right now. July 4th was a Monday so we didn't have class, which meant 2 weeks went by between classes and I got a taste of Spring Fever, I guess. Unfortunately, I don't get a summer vacation from school. I really shouldn't complain. Hell, I only go once a week. But right now, I don't want to go at all. In fact, I should be doing homework this very minute. What am I doing instead? Wasting time, procrastinating, being lazy...call it whatever you like. My opinion is that writing is an outlet for me to express myself and relax, which is vital to my mental health and therefore required for my field of study. That makes sense right? So, in the big picture, I am doing homework. I just won't be graded on it.
Heather got 2 teeth extracted the other day. She was miserable. I've never seen her like that. They gave her 7.5mg Lortab but it wasn't helping. She tossed and turned and whined all night. She got up several times to take baths. Just laying in the hot water soothed her a little, but when she came back to bed, she was pitiful again. I felt so bad becasue I couldn't do anything to help. Yesterday was a little better, but she was still sore and cranky from it. She's been at work all day and should be home soon. I hope she's not cranky tonight. I'm poopy and needy, but if she's cranky I'll leave her alone.
My Nic came over the other night and let me dye her hair. I've never dyed anyone's hair before, other than my baby nephew and that was blue just for shits and giggles. It actually turned out green so that should have been a red flag right there, but Nikki didn't know this before she agreed to let me do it. Surprizingly, I did a pretty good job. Pretty good, not great, or perfect or even good...just pretty good. I only missed one huge streak. Lucky for me (or for Nikki, I guess) she bought 2 bottles of dye and I only used 1 to begin with. After discovering the neglected chunk of hair, we decided to use the 'phone a friend' lifeline and I called Davian, my most awesome hair care professional and friend. I explained what I did and she told me to just do that side again with the 2nd bottle. No biggie. So I did and it looked fine from what I can tell. Nic hasn't told me how the final product looks once it's been styled, but I'm sure if it wasn't good, I'd have heard about it by now. Nikki's a Navejo Bitch and it takes a lot to upset her, but once she's pissed off, the whole world knows it and you better get out of the way!
I'm super excited because this time tomorrow I will be on my way to Hollywood 27 to stand in line for who knows how long to see the midnight showing of Harry Potter and Deathly Hallows pt. 2! That sentence didn't express how truly excited I am. Let me see if I can somehow....
I'M SUPER EXCITED!!!!
That'll work. I've been waiting for this for 6 years. Some people have been waiting longer than that, but I didn't get into the world of HP until '05. My bestie, John Thomas (who, seemingly, I will never see again) made me go with him in the summer of '04 to watch HP and Prizoner of Azkaban. That's the 3rd one. After that he tried to convince me to read the books. "They're so much better," he said. "The movies leave a lot out," he said. Psshhht. I don't care enough to read those silly children's books. Then in 2005 when William had to go Bulgaria for 2 weeks, I was bored enough to pick up book 1 of the HP series. Thus began my eternal geekness. I was hooked. Since I hadn't seen the first 2 movies, there was tons of shit that I didn't know about, plus all the shit that the movies leave out anyway. Up to that point there were only 5 books out. I devoured them all in 2 weeks. And if you've ever seen of the HP books, you know that means I reading constantly. It was later that same year when book 6 was released and I consumed it within days. Then I rented the first 3 movies and watched them. The 4th came out and I went to the theater to see it. Then I got crazy. When the 5th movie came out, i was working at O'Charley's and a guy there was crazy about HP too so we agreed to go see the midnight show on opening night. He brought his mom and I brought my Nic, a guy who was a dad-like person to me at the time, William, and another friend of ours, Jay. We saw it in IMAX 3D, which was overrated. Then for the 6th movie, it was just me and Nikki, who blubbered like a baby. I started crying several minutes before the tear-jerking scene just because I knew it was coming. Nic hasn't read all of the books so she's behind the times. The 7th movie, which is part 1 of the last book was me, Nic, and my Heathers. That was the first time Heather had been to a midnight HP show. She thought it was retarded to go stand in line for all that time and stay up late as fuck just to be able to say that we saw it first. But that's what I do. And we're doing it again tomorrow night!!! It's kinda sad in a way because this is the very last one. There will be no more. All gone. The end. Bye-bye. :-( I'm super excited!
Well, the kids arrived a short while ago, breaking my concentration and indicating the end of my relaxation. Plus, my Heathers is home from work so I'm gonna spend time with her. She's not cranky so I get to cuddle!
I know this was really long, but that's what happens when I go so long without writing. Maybe I should be a writer. I like writing. I'd love to get paid to just sit and write all day. Anyway, I'll try not to wait so long next time so you won't have to suffer through such a long post. Peace, Love, & Anal beads! (if you're into that sort of thing)
So much has been going on....
I took that week between jobs and got a lot of much needed housework done, as planned. I also spent a lot of time with the kids, as planned. I started at Quiznos on July 2nd, as planned. And I'm adjusting well, I think. My first week sucked for a couple of reasons. 1) I developed a sinus infection, presumably from swimming the week prior so I was sick as fuck. 2) Due to the sinus infection, which rendered me miserable, my boss sent me home early on my 4th day so that I could go to the doctor (who gave me antibiotics in the form of mongo horse pills, but they totally worked so I guess I should stop bitching). 3) I felt completely lost because I had no idea what the hell I was doing and apparently neither does anyone else at that place. 4) For some reason I had a piss poor attitude and decided that I didn't like it there. That's more than a couple, but once I started naming off the reasons, more just kept coming to mind.
I'm feeling better about it now, though. I'm learning the morning routine. Everything is very structured. I've been opening so when I get there, I count the register and do the morning paperwork. Then I have to go through a checklist that's 4 pages long, but it's all one sentence shit.
- Turn on soup warmer
- Turn on sauce cooler
- Check breakfast stock
- Count bread
- Pull bread from freezer according to what will be needed for the day
"sauteed". I call it black and soggy. So work is going well, I guess.
The kids are evil. I don't know what the deal is lately. I guess they've been at my house too much and I'm way more lax than William so they've gotten out of the habit of behaving. There's a line between being mean and being stern and I've blurred it, apparently. I've always felt like William is too hard on them, telling them they can't do something for no reason at all. I feel like unless there's a reason why they shouldn't be allowed to do it, let them do it. Here lately though, they're taking advantage of my leniency. Instead of "Hey, Mom, can I go to the playground/basketball court/my friends house?" I get "I'm going to...." as they're running out the door. Um, excuse me? And normally it's "I'm hungry, when are we having dinner?" But lately its "I'm starving to death, are you ever gonna feed us?" Um, excuse me? And I know it's my fault. I don't discipline them. Part of the reason for that is I thought I had them trained. You know, you teach a dog something and once it's instilled in their minds, you never have to remind them. It just becomes the way it is. Don't get on the furniture. Don't jump on people. Don't shit in the floor. Don't snatch food. Stuff like that. You don't have to keep telling the dog for years and years. Once they learn it, they know it. For some reason, I assumed children were as smart, if not smarter, than dogs. They used to speak to me respectfully and ask permission for shit. I thought once they knew it was supposed to be done that way, they would just always do it. Nuh uh. I guess I'm gonna have to start putting the smack down again. And that really sucks because they don't like me when I put the smack down and I don't like it when they don't like me. So now, since they're evil, I have to make myself miserable. See how I blame them for my mistakes? Ya liked that, didn't ya?
School is...school. That last class I was in completely sucked. Statistics involves math. I hate math. This class is Biological Psychology, which is basically about the chemical aspect of craziness. I guess I should say psychological illnesses, but I'm just not that sensitive. I like the material. It's interesting and all. I'm just not feeling school right now. July 4th was a Monday so we didn't have class, which meant 2 weeks went by between classes and I got a taste of Spring Fever, I guess. Unfortunately, I don't get a summer vacation from school. I really shouldn't complain. Hell, I only go once a week. But right now, I don't want to go at all. In fact, I should be doing homework this very minute. What am I doing instead? Wasting time, procrastinating, being lazy...call it whatever you like. My opinion is that writing is an outlet for me to express myself and relax, which is vital to my mental health and therefore required for my field of study. That makes sense right? So, in the big picture, I am doing homework. I just won't be graded on it.
Heather got 2 teeth extracted the other day. She was miserable. I've never seen her like that. They gave her 7.5mg Lortab but it wasn't helping. She tossed and turned and whined all night. She got up several times to take baths. Just laying in the hot water soothed her a little, but when she came back to bed, she was pitiful again. I felt so bad becasue I couldn't do anything to help. Yesterday was a little better, but she was still sore and cranky from it. She's been at work all day and should be home soon. I hope she's not cranky tonight. I'm poopy and needy, but if she's cranky I'll leave her alone.
My Nic came over the other night and let me dye her hair. I've never dyed anyone's hair before, other than my baby nephew and that was blue just for shits and giggles. It actually turned out green so that should have been a red flag right there, but Nikki didn't know this before she agreed to let me do it. Surprizingly, I did a pretty good job. Pretty good, not great, or perfect or even good...just pretty good. I only missed one huge streak. Lucky for me (or for Nikki, I guess) she bought 2 bottles of dye and I only used 1 to begin with. After discovering the neglected chunk of hair, we decided to use the 'phone a friend' lifeline and I called Davian, my most awesome hair care professional and friend. I explained what I did and she told me to just do that side again with the 2nd bottle. No biggie. So I did and it looked fine from what I can tell. Nic hasn't told me how the final product looks once it's been styled, but I'm sure if it wasn't good, I'd have heard about it by now. Nikki's a Navejo Bitch and it takes a lot to upset her, but once she's pissed off, the whole world knows it and you better get out of the way!
I'm super excited because this time tomorrow I will be on my way to Hollywood 27 to stand in line for who knows how long to see the midnight showing of Harry Potter and Deathly Hallows pt. 2! That sentence didn't express how truly excited I am. Let me see if I can somehow....
I'M SUPER EXCITED!!!!
That'll work. I've been waiting for this for 6 years. Some people have been waiting longer than that, but I didn't get into the world of HP until '05. My bestie, John Thomas (who, seemingly, I will never see again) made me go with him in the summer of '04 to watch HP and Prizoner of Azkaban. That's the 3rd one. After that he tried to convince me to read the books. "They're so much better," he said. "The movies leave a lot out," he said. Psshhht. I don't care enough to read those silly children's books. Then in 2005 when William had to go Bulgaria for 2 weeks, I was bored enough to pick up book 1 of the HP series. Thus began my eternal geekness. I was hooked. Since I hadn't seen the first 2 movies, there was tons of shit that I didn't know about, plus all the shit that the movies leave out anyway. Up to that point there were only 5 books out. I devoured them all in 2 weeks. And if you've ever seen of the HP books, you know that means I reading constantly. It was later that same year when book 6 was released and I consumed it within days. Then I rented the first 3 movies and watched them. The 4th came out and I went to the theater to see it. Then I got crazy. When the 5th movie came out, i was working at O'Charley's and a guy there was crazy about HP too so we agreed to go see the midnight show on opening night. He brought his mom and I brought my Nic, a guy who was a dad-like person to me at the time, William, and another friend of ours, Jay. We saw it in IMAX 3D, which was overrated. Then for the 6th movie, it was just me and Nikki, who blubbered like a baby. I started crying several minutes before the tear-jerking scene just because I knew it was coming. Nic hasn't read all of the books so she's behind the times. The 7th movie, which is part 1 of the last book was me, Nic, and my Heathers. That was the first time Heather had been to a midnight HP show. She thought it was retarded to go stand in line for all that time and stay up late as fuck just to be able to say that we saw it first. But that's what I do. And we're doing it again tomorrow night!!! It's kinda sad in a way because this is the very last one. There will be no more. All gone. The end. Bye-bye. :-( I'm super excited!
Well, the kids arrived a short while ago, breaking my concentration and indicating the end of my relaxation. Plus, my Heathers is home from work so I'm gonna spend time with her. She's not cranky so I get to cuddle!
I know this was really long, but that's what happens when I go so long without writing. Maybe I should be a writer. I like writing. I'd love to get paid to just sit and write all day. Anyway, I'll try not to wait so long next time so you won't have to suffer through such a long post. Peace, Love, & Anal beads! (if you're into that sort of thing)
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